The topic was even mentioned in church this morning when this passage was read,
Mt 7:7 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: 8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.I guess if I have to ask God, then I shouldn't be so surprised that I have to ask J**** for things that I want or expect from him.
So it is Sunday morning, and we have been going as a family a lot here lately. So this morning no one really had the gumption to go, but my wonderful mother called and goaded us on our way. J**** says that he doesn't want to go, that he thinks he'll stay home and relax. So I ask. He grumbles, growls, hollers, stomps his feet, acts very immaturely, but he does end up going.
Here was my take on it. If he's not going to go and help me keep them in line in church, then he should do something productive and not get a mini-vacation. I don't get the alone time and have to do nothing. I demand (hehehe) equity. Please?
He says he just went so he wouldn't be expected to clean house. That sort of hurts my feelings. I regard church very highly as a way to mentally refuel myself. He also seems refreshed after being with other Christians. He throws this fit each time. Then, he ends up going with us each time. I wish there could be a little less drama each week.
So, back to the just ask...Why? when he huffs, stomps, pouts, makes snide remarks? I'd just as well do it myself.
On March 16 we begin Marriage Counseling with BHP. Oh, I've got plenty to say, but - what will I do when she tells me I need to adjust my ways too? Guess I'll just huff, stomp, pout, and make snide remarks.
2 comments:
We talked about this same thing in rehab today (before I walked out). As addicts we revert back to old behavior when things start to get uncomfortable. For me at times I look like the kid at the grociery store who wanted a candy bar and was told no. It worked for us as a child. Many of us never learned, or never got past that point of acceptance, and trust that maybe it is good thing to do what we do not want to do. For me i acted childish to get my my way. CONTROL it is what every addict/alcoholic wants to have. probally since we can not control ourselves. I speak from experience. Things will change, it takes time.
Peace
Hugs and Kisses
On other thought. I have gone to church the last 3 weekend by myself. I did it for me. For my recovery. I learned that from my wifes Al-alon meeting. I didn't cause it, can't control it, and cant change it.
Peace
hugs and Kisses
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