I Need to Thank a Lot of Folks

Thank you to my sister:

She says she feels ugly, but believe me folks, my sister is the most beautiful person I know. Except for maybe me.

I say this because, she is there for me. She doesn't pass judgment on me. She understands me. She tolerates me (not an easy job).

The reason I am saying this is because of last night.

Honestly, if you got a call at 8:45 pm that said: "Hey, can you hear me? I'm whispering. Yeah, he's drunk. Sis, he put his hands on me for the first time. I didn't fight back. The kids were watching. When we get a chance, we are leaving. Where? Up to your house I guess. You sure. Okay. I haven't decided yet. If you don't hear from me then all is well. I have the phone set so if I hit a button it will call you if there's trouble. I love you too. Thank you." what would you do?

Well if you are my sister, you drop everything and get ready for your sister, a 6 year old, a 5 year old, and a toddler. You put your problems on hold and open your heart and your door to these scared babies and their idiot mother. I think she loves us.

Thank you to wonderful school teachers and counselors:

F**** is in 1st Grade, and G**** is in Kindergarten. School has been in session now for approximately one and a half months. How many kindergarteners do you know who have already had meetings with the school counselor over her feelings? First episode, cute. Second episode, not so cute.

First episode she wanted to talk to speak to her counselor because she was sad that her Papaw J*** had died. She told the counselor that Papaw fell into the river and was killed by a shark. Well Papaw was 99+ and died in his sleep of a massive heart attack in the hospital.

Second episode was to talk about being scared. "Daddy acts scary sometimes." "He hurts Mommy's feelings."

Everyday first grade has a share time and they tell what they did the night before. F**** wanted to tell her class about last night. I told her she could tell the other kids she stayed the night at Aunt D's but not to tell the rest it may scare them. But, it is okay if she tells her teacher or her counselor. (sweet girl.)

Thank you to a feisty, caring mother-in-law:

I was torn about whether I should call her and tell her what was happening, she has so many tribulations in her life as it is. But I made the decision to forewarn her. I told her I was calling her to let her know that the girls and I were okay and where we were going. I told her the only reason I was calling was to forewarn her that if he woke up and saw we were gone and decided to call her, she could make her own decision about answering the phone.

She appreciated me calling. The next morning she called and couldn't reach me, I called her back to her relief and she cried. She told me she was worried and that she was so mad at him she could spit in his face, especially after the things that he had seen his father do to her. She told me to do whatever I needed to do to keep her grandbabies safe and she would understand.

Thank you to my coworkers:

When you are going through a lot of crazy stuff at home, sometimes it makes you crazy at work. And sometimes like today, you leave early, because you want to pick your babies up at school to let them feel safe. They tolerate me and are patient with me and know that I will do what I need to do -- first for my children, then for myself. They try not to be judgmental, but they know that I will accept their constructive input. I am blessed to have them cover for me when I am less than sane.

Thank you to my children:

They are bearing the brunt of my "wishy-washy" ways. F**** told the counselor that it was a scary night, she was afraid because of what he said he would do to her Mommy, she is scared. The counselor told her when Mommy and Daddy fight she needs to go to another room so Mommy doesn't have to worry about her and sometimes children don't need to see/hear what Mommy/Daddy are fighting about. Can you do that? She said, "NO, what if he hurts my Mommy."

I am thankful that they love their Mommy and worry about me. They shouldn't have to be in such a situation.

Thank you to my God:

For my strength and sanity. I do NOT worry. To worry is to lack faith. "I can do all things through Christ who strengtheneth me."

and Thank you to J****:

If he hadn't done the things he had done last night to the extreme that he did. I would not have been jolted back to reality. He reminded me of why I started divorce proceedings in the first place. I know it's strange to thank him, but all things happen for a reason. Right?